This is how we know love: Jesus laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. But if a person has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need and that person doesn’t care—how can the love of God remain in him?
Little children, let’s not love with words or speech but with action and truth.
~1 John 3: 16-18
Hello and welcome to this stop along Jen Hatmaker's "For the Love" blog tour! I am so excited that you are here, and I welcome you with open arms. Please pull up a comfy chair, grab a cup of coffee, tea, wine, or whatever your choice is, and enjoy the read. :)
My journey with Jen started a few years ago when I did the 7 study with my Sunday School class. I was hooked from that point! From there I have read Jen's personal journey with the 7 experiment, Interrupted, and Out the the Spin Cycle devotional. When I saw a post from Jen's Facebook page this spring with a sign up to be a part of the launch group for her new book "For the Love: Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards," I thought, "why not?" It stated that she was only taking 500 people, so I put down my coffee mug (which shows how serious I was) and signed up immediately with hopes that I would make it, but not really expecting to. Finding out later that 5,000 people had signed up to be a part of this launch, my expectations diminished further, but hope still held on, check my email neurotically, 5 times an hour. Spring break rolled around, and we left for our regular skiing trip in New Mexico where there is NO SIGNAL, I repeat, NO SIGNAL. Apparently the whole town runs on one server, which didn't help my situation. I would try and check my email during non-peak times to see if that email had come through yet. As we were nearing the end of our vacation, I was checking my email one last time for the day, and there it was...
They may have heard my squeal all the way back to Texas. I was in disbelief!! I immediately downloaded our proof version, ran back to the bedroom for the peace and quiet, and began to read! Thus began a life changing experience for me. Not only did this book and Jen's oh-so-wise words make a difference in my heart, mind, and soul, but belonging to a launch team who laughed together, cried together, and prayed together. What started as a Facebook group where we could discuss the book and the effect it has had on our lives, turned into a tribe of women (and a #bandoffour men) encouraging each other through this craziness we call life. I am forever grateful and forever changed.
You guys this book! This book is for everyone! Yes it is marketed towards women, but the #bandoffour men on our launch team enjoyed it as well. Jen's writes so beautifully and intimately that you feel like you are having a conversation with her. You will feel like one of her close friends after the reading of this book (I still believe this is true. ) ;) Jen hits everything in this book about showing and extending God's grace for everyone.
She starts with having grace for ourselves. I think that is the hardest. It is so much easier to have grace for others while we sit and beat up ourselves constantly. She will make you laugh, make your cry, and make you challenge your unrealistic expectations that you have for yourself in the very first chapters. Here are some gems from this section.
Chapter 2: On Turning Forty (Image credit Leslie Carlton)
Chapter 3: On Calling and Haitian Moms (Image credit Carlee Ann Easton)
Chapter 4: Fashion Concerns (Image credit Carlee Ann Easton)
Chapter 5: Run Your Race (Image credit Carlee Ann Easton)
Chapter 6: Not Buying (Image credit Leslie Carlton)
Chapter 7: Tell the Truth (Image credit Krista Wilbur)
Chapter 8: Thank you Notes (Part 1) (Image credit Carlee Ann Easton)
The second section of the book is titled, "All These People Who Live in Your House." Probably the second hardest people to have grace for because you live and deal with them.....ALL.THE.TIME. #bless
Chapter 9: Hope for Spicy Families (Image credit Bethany Beams)
Chapter 10: Surviving School (Image credit Bethany Beams)
Chapter 11: Dear Kids (Image credit Jen Hatmaker)
Chapter 12:Marriage: Have Fun and Stuff (Image credit Leslie Carlton)
Chapter 13: Jesus Kids (Image Credit Leslie Carlton)
The third section of For the Love covers those around us. Those we know, and those we don't. Those we like, and those we don't. You also get some bonus tasty recipes for starting a supper club! (You may notice that there is no quote from chapter 19 - that is the chapter that holds all the delicious recipes!)
Chapter 15: Supper Club (Image credit Leslie Carlton)
Chapter 16: Porches as Altars (Image credit Leslie Carlton)
Chapter 17: Quirky (Image credit Bridgette Cook)
Chapter 18: Difficult People (Image credit Krista Wilbur)
In the 4th and final section of the book, Jen writes about the grace in the church. This includes, church leaders, congregations, and the people we serve.
Chapter 19: Poverty Tourism (Image credit Carlee Ann Easton)
Chapter 22: Dear Church... (Image credit Kelly Richards Smith)
Chapter 23: If Social Media Were Around (Image credit Leslie Carlton)
Chapter 25: Dear Christians, Please Stop Being Crappy
Chapter 26: On Women
I hope these little glimpses into each chapter give you a small idea of the awesomeness that is this book! Jen encourages her reads to go forth and love well, receiving and sharing God's grace.
I am so excited for today's release date, so I can actually talk with those around me in my day to day life about taking things #offthebeam, or about forgetting our messes and about opening our homes (and hearts) to others to share in this life with us. We only get one, so it's really just a shame to waste it away waiting for that one day when we have it all together.
In celebration of For the Love's launch, I will be giving away 2 copies on my FB page, Breaking for Good. Here are the steps to get into the giveaway.
1. Like the Breaking for Good Facebook page (unless you already have).
2. Share the post with the giveaway. If you like and/or comment on the giveaway post that will give you one bonus entry. Names will be drawn at 7:00 tomorrow evening (Texas time :) )
I hope that you enjoy this book as much as I have, and it inspires you just the same. To visit other blogs of launch team members about the book, you can visit the For the Love blog tour page.
So anyone who knows me, knows that I am over the moon to be in the launch group for Jan Hatmaker's new book, For the Love, Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards. I have been reading and rereading this book since March, and I cannot get enough of it. I am so excited that soon it will be in the hands of everyone, so we can talk about it!!!
One of the ladies in the launch group has started a Friday Five post, and this Friday she has chosen to to do top 5 quotes from the book. Mrs. Disciple has actually opened it up to all the For the Love Launch team to connect our blogs to hers, so we can have one large blog event and get to see everyone's take away from the book.
I wasn't sure I was going to be able to blog today due to my son's birthday party this evening. He planned quite a night that kept us busy all evening, but now they have retreated upstairs to play Catan, so I am taking a moment to breath and write. :)
It's so hard to just pick 5 quotes. I have about 5 quotes underlined per page in some chapters. Thee is just so much goodness here. It's like picking a favorite ice cream. Really??? I just like them all. Ice cream is my favorite ice cream. That being said I made the painful cuts, and here are my top 5:
1. "Folks who thrive in God's grace give grace easily, but the self-critical person becomes other-critical." Guys this is just in the intro. You haven't even dived into the chapters yet, and she hits you with this one! I love and hate this at the same time because I constantly swing back and forth on this. I never cared to look for the cause until I read this. So much truth. It opened my eyes to how I am receiving God's grace and how that directly relates to how I give grace to others. Talk about "aha" moment.
2. "Balance. It's like a unicorn: we've heard about it, everyone talks about it, and makes airbrushed T-shirts celebrating it, it seems super rad, but we haven't actually seen one. I'm beginning to think it isn't a thing." LOL!! This one came from Chapter 1: The Worst Beam Ever, and it had me rolling for a little while. I love how she puts it. The 80s girl in my could totally visual the unicorn jumping through the air, mane blowing in the breeze with the rainbow in the background. I am sure I had one of the shirts. This balance thing we constantly talk about, strive for, and think others have achieved. It's all imaginary. As soon as you think you have all your ducks in a row, something falls out of place, and you are starting all over again. Maybe it's time to start a new goal.
3. "You are smart and able, and getting older is not a tragedy." This comes from Chapter 6 - Not Buying. In this chapter, Jen talks about how the world is trying to sell us things based on the fact that we need them to make ourselves beautiful, make life easier, or keep us from aging. The commercials fill our heads with how each product will make our lives better with their product. It also gets in our kiddos heads. My own daughter looking at my face the other day said, "Mommy you should get that cream from the commercial. It will make your skin flawless!" Nothing like a child's honesty to humble your perspective, but it also shows that this commercial taught her that if mommy's skin isn't perfect (not that I thought it was too bad), it can be made "flawless" with their cream. Wow. How did our grandmother's ever survive? We should celebrate our abilities and not take the easy way out each time. We should also celebrate aging and getting older. It is taken so for granted, as this is not a guarantee for anyone.
4. "Every parent blows it. Every kid comes unhinged. Every family goes off the rails. That doesn't mean we are ruined: it means we are ordinary." This quote from Chapter 9 - Hope for Spicy Families is right on for me and my family. My poor son is the only sweet member of our crazy foursome, and I think we have corrupted him a little bit. Yelling, losing patience, and fits are a daily struggle, but so is apologizing, cuddling, and saying, "I love you." Sweet with the spicy means our family is not dysfunctional, we are normal, and the sooner we accept this and stop putting on the perfect front, the sooner we can stop placing guilt on ourselves and just enjoy being who we are, spiciness and all.
5. "Ironically, the more responsibility people take for their own spiritual development and their neighbor, the healthier they become - also, less resentful of the church, less dependent on the programming, and less reliant on the pastors." In chapter 22 - Dear church...Jen writes to both areas of the church, the leaders and the congregation. This quote hit me right between the eyes because truly for most of my life I looked to my pastors for spiritual guidance and growth. Not to discredit this, as pastors serve as great shepherds, but at some point I need to take some responsibility in my walk with Jesus. I had never pondered such things before. Taking responsibility for this ended up helping me to feel free instead of burdened. You mean I can look outside my church for studies? I can go to the bookstore with no recommendation and find a book that speaks to me spiritually? Talk about feeling empowered and re-energized.
Like I said, this is really just a sip of what is the fire hose of life changing, laugh inducing, tear jerking goodness that is in the book. The book released August 18th and is already on the shelves in Barnes and Noble, so For the Love go get it!!!
A few weeks ago I was checking out the scripture for the upcoming sermon, so I could prep for my children's sermon (when I mean prep, I mean read the scripture, think about it for a week, and still go up to the front of the church with a general idea and hope for lots of grace). I read the title, Running to Win, and saw that it was based off of 1 Corinthians 9:19-27.
19 Although I’m free from all people, I make myself a slave to all people, to recruit more of them. 20 I act like a Jew to the Jews, so I can recruit Jews. I act like I’m under the Law to those under the Law, so I can recruit those who are under the Law (though I myself am not under the Law). 21 I act like I’m outside the Law to those who are outside the Law, so I can recruit those outside the Law (though I’m not outside the law of God but rather under the law of Christ).22 I act weak to the weak, so I can recruit the weak. I have become all things to all people, so I could save some by all possible means. 23 All the things I do are for the sake of the gospel, so I can be a partner with it. 24 Don’t you know that all the runners in the stadium run, but only one gets the prize? So run to win. 25 Everyone who competes practices self-discipline in everything. The runners do this to get a crown of leaves that shrivel up and die, but we do it to receive a crown that never dies. 26 So now this is how I run—not without a clear goal in sight. I fight like a boxer in the ring, not like someone who is shadowboxing. 27 Rather, I’m landing punches on my own body and subduing it like a slave. I do this to be sure that I myself won’t be disqualified after preaching to others.
When I read this verse it immediately took me to a chapter that I had recently read in Jen Hatmaker's upcoming book, For The Love (available Aug. 18th). In the chapter Run Your Race, Jen discusses how we are each running our own race, and how we should not only feel encouraged for ourselves, but also cheer along other running beside us. I decided that God had put that chapter in my life to preach to the kids at our church.
On Sunday I went up to the front of the church again with just the general idea. Let's be real here, You can right a script for a children's sermon, but inevitably one of the children is going to start chasing rabbits and throw you off your script, so I prefer to chase rabbits with them instead. :)
I asked them how many of them liked to run, and just about all of them raised their hands. I told them that when I was a kid, I loved to run too, but now that I am an adult, my body is not quite the same, so I do not enjoy running as much. I told them when I am asked to sign up for a race, I usually say no since I do not enjoy running. Then I went on to say if I don't like running does that mean that I can never do races? I asked them what other kind of races there are. I got many answers (car, three-legged, bike, motorcycle, pie-eating - we will save that story for...NEVER!).
I told them that just because I don't like to run, doesn't mean that I can't compete in a race ever again. It just means that I need to find MY race and join in. I told them that this is kind of like how we serve God and our race to the finish line of life. Some people are good at singing in the choir or the band, while others enjoy evangelizing. Some of the them may like to go on mission trips, but some of them may prefer to serve at our church. I told them that each one of those things is important in bringing people in and closer to Christ.
I asked them what they would do if a friend was in a running race and beating them. I asked if they would reach their foot out to trip their friend, so they couldn't be ahead? Many of them shook their head with a horrified look on their face while others giggled. I said that they were right, we shouldn't do that. Tripping their friend is going to make them run any faster, and it's only going to create bad feelings. In that same way, when we see our friends doing well for God, we shouldn't be jealous. We should be proud of them and cheer them on. Their race is not our race.
Plus the race to God is not about who finishes first. It's about doing the best with the gifts and opportunities God has given you. At the end, we don't want a 1st place medal. We just want a seat in Heaven and to hear the words, "Well done." from our Heavenly Father.
My hope for each of you is that you find your gifts, realize your opportunities, and run your race.
Awesome. It's become a thing in our culture. If you google just the word awesome, tons of images and memes pop up, some funny and some quite "interesting" to put it nicely.
Being "awesome" is a running joke in my house as my husband likes to claim it's pretty much woven into his DNA. My son even has a shirt that just says #awesome, and we searched for one for my husband b/c my son only felt it was appropriate. (We didn't find one though. His awesomeness will just have to radiate from his inner being instead of from words on his shirt).
Just recently though I received the motivation to stop being "awesome."
As I have posted previously, I was chosen to be on the launch time for Jen Hatmaker's new book, For the Love, which will be released in August. I have already devoured the book that was sent to me. I have laughed, been humbled and inspired, and even learned some new recipes! For those of you who cry, you will probably cry too. I am just not a crier.
In her first chapter in the book Jen talks about the pressure we put on ourselves to be everything to everyone and be great at everything. I don't know about you, but this goes straight to my core. I know that I feel pressure from every which way of my life to volunteer, make things, attend, support, etc. I feel the need to do all things things asked from others (and from myself), but why? If I am going to be honest here, sometimes it's because I want others to think that I can do it all, that I am talented, that I have it all together. In reality, piling up these expectations does the opposite. I am unfocused, my house turns into a bigger disaster area than it already is (which I am pretty sure is just a physical representation of how my brain looks), and I don't do anything well. My husband and I have talked many times about when one of use is overstretched about how we feel that we are getting nowhere. We are doing a bunch of "things" but we feel like we are failing at all of them.
In her book, Jen says, "We need to quit trying to be awesome and instead be wise."
Wise.
When I think of wise, I think of people who are experienced in years, who have been there and done that. I think of certain long time members in our church, who I look up to. When I think of them, I think of people who are God-focused. They have their channels that they are plugged into and passionate about, and they don't have a problem saying no to those things that they know are for other people's gifts.
In another study that I am doing, The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst, she says, "we have to know that God is especially fond of filling the empty spaces. God is a master at providing just the right thing at just the right timing."
Hello! Wake up call!!! I am not meant to be everything to everyone. I am not meant to fill every volunteer spot. I don't have to do everything at my house. I don't even have to be everything to my children. In doing that I am saying, "God I got this, I don't need to trust you to fill those empty spaces." Yikes.
How about I just be wise, and instead let God be awesome?
Isn't that the way it is supposed to be? Shouldn't God be the awesome one, and we can just give Him the glory?
Lesson learned. Take stock of my commitments, be wise about what I am choosing, stop getting in the way of other people trying to use their gifts, and let God be awesome.
So while on vacation with my family this spring break, I received some awesome news. I was checking my email on the very slow (I mean dial up could have beaten it) internet connection in the town we were staying at, and I get an email from For the Love Team. SQUEAL!!!
Now backtrack a week ago, I was looking at Facebook, and I saw this...
Of course I jump on, apply less than an hour after the original post, then proceed to check Facebook and email a ridiculous amount of times for the rest of the week. When I hadn't heard anything before we left on vacation, I had convinced myself that they were still sorting through everything, since I had read on Facebook that they had about 5000 applicants and only 500 spots (WOW!). A little part of me knew my chances were slim and prepared for the worst. I went on vacation vowing not to be obsessed with checking email, and I did pretty good. I was just checking that night for the first time the whole day, and up the email popped!
I had to read it twice to make sure I was not just reading what I wanted to read! It started off with the best message from Jen herself, then went on to explain the details of the launch team. I seriously have been on cloud 9 since! If you haven't realized it by now, I am slightly obsessed with Jen (in a healthy, love her perspective and message way, although I am a little starstruck at the thought of seeing her at Women of Faith this year!) I am currently leading an online study on her book 7, and her other book I read earlier this year, Interrupted, has completely ruined my life for good!
I am honored and a little overwhelmed at the opportunity to be a part of the release of her new book, For the Love. I still feel like I am dreaming, but it's for real!! While I can't divulge any information yet, be on the lookout for tidbits from the book (I have have only just started, and I am already loving it!) and information on how to pre-order it. If you keep up with Jen Hatmaker on Facebook or on Jen's blog, you have seen her mention the book For the Love as she has gone through the writing process. The full title is For the Love: Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards. Just the title has me nodding and saying, "Yes!"
While this is a journey that I never in my wildest dreams thought I would be on, here I am! I can't wait to see what God has in store for me with this one! Stay tuned....
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